Merry Christmas!

Shawn and I had a great Christmas together. Last year we'd only been dating for about six months so our relationship was still fairly new. He went home to Kentucky to be with his family, and I went to Dallas to be with the Timiney's. It was really special to be together this year even though we missed our families.

For Christmas I gave him the following:
* Indianapolis Colts t-shirt
*Kentucky Wildcats t-shirt
*49'ers mug
*A Yamato Macross 1/60 VF-1S Super Valkyrie Roy-part of the Robotech something or another thing he loved from his childhood. :) (link to picture)
*A Neck Massager pillow-actually from Bailey because he chewed up his other one
*Some ancient Roman/Greek coins

Bailey got a bazillion new squeaky toys, a bunch of doggy treats, and a cute Christmasy doggy sweater. He's usually pretty good about wearing clothes but this fit a little small so we took it off after we snuck in a few pictures:




For Christmas he gave me the following:
*Anne of Green Gables/Anne of Avonlea/The Continuing Story on DVD
*A CHI Turbo flat iron
*A totally amazingly cute and cool picnic basket! I'm soooo excited to use it :)
*A purple snuggy
*A drawing of a penguin on my Christmas Card. Apparently it's "horrible and must be destroyed", but I love it to death and I will NOT destroy it. So there!
*The beginning of my "new car fund"

Stephanie and Brad gave me a really pretty necklace, Shawns family gave me a Sony Cyber-Shot camera and a few odds and ends, and my family gave me a gift certificate to Day Murray Music. I think I'm going to wait until my trip to Utah to use the gift certificate so I can get more bang for my buck by avoiding shipping charges. I'll be there in less than three weeks, wow!

For dinner, Shawn didn't want me to slave away like I did at Thanksgiving. I don't consider it slaving away but he did :) I had made up some Spicy Pork Bulgogi a few weeks ago, and I made some Kimchi Pancakes. Tasty, Simple and VERY filling. Here are a few pictures of the meal courtesy of my fancy new camera :)

Two More Sleeps!

G'night!

What did the concert say to the toothbrush?

I don't know the punchline to that joke, but I'm pretty sure I'll feel like I got punched in the face come tomorrow morning. My friend Leigh and I are going to the Bobby Bones Show Christmas Concert tonight. Performing are THE FRAY, Owl City, Jason Derulo & Iyaz. We both love The Fray and this will be a fun opportunity to go see them. The last time I was out at a concert on a weekday THIS happened, and I got home and was in bed around 2 a.m. That was hellish the next day when I had to wake up for work. The morning after the concert I have to be to the dentist by 7:45 a.m. Should I just stay up and not sleep at all? Take a 2 hour power nap? At least it's my half day so I can go home and crash after 3 1/2 hours. :)

Happiness and Joy :)

My friend Stephanie sent me an email to see if I'd write a letter of memories about Ashlyn, her daughter. She's 7 (I think) and such a sweetheart. Nothing compares to the love of a child, especially when you're having a hard day.

Pssst

....I'm going to make my blog private. When I get time I'll start going through and adding the email addresses I know about, but I'm sure I'll end up missing some of you. I'd simply LOVE it if you'd reply with your email address :)

Thanks
~Amy

What a great idea!!

Shawns dad said he wanted a "thoughtful, non-expensive gift that reminded him of the true spirit of Christmas" So we decided to buy him something he's been wanting for a while but also send him a framed picture of Shawn, Bailey and myself. Here are a few of the attempts :p

If I'd posted every picture that ended up with my eyes closed/mostly closed, there wouldn't be enough room for them all

Bailey: "You are the center of my world"

My attempt to hold the camera. Shawn's doing his murder the dog pose because he had a feeling the picture would be a failure :p

Shawns idea: I'll take the picture AND hold the dog in place so he doesn't get super excited that you're touching him.

Oh no! He's got him in a choke hold! Quick say cheese!

Shawn looks like he's playing darts with Bailey's head. Oh well-Merry Christmas :)

Tree in Progress

Shawn and I went shopping yesterday afternoon for a few presents and a Christmas Tree. We went to Garden Ridge first, which is usually known for it's good selection and prices. We were both sooo thirsty so Shawn picked up a few bottles of Soda for us to drink while we were shopping. After looking around for 10-15 minutes and not really finding anything we were in love with, we went to go check out. One problem--the line was 98 miles long. Maybe that's an exaggeration, but it sure didn't feel like it. People were abandoning their carts left and right and walking out, but guess who had already "purchased" something? Yup-that'd be us. Because we're both such honest, law-abiding citizens we stood in line for 25 minutes to purchase a Sprite, a Diet Coke, and a bag of bows.

Next we headed to Target. We found a tree we really loved but they were all sold out. We picked up a few random presents and headed off to try out Sears. We found a "meh" tree there (4.5 ft pre-lit), but they only had like one aisle of decorations so we opted to go to Hobby Lobby. For you Utahns-Hobby Lobby is like Michaels/Roberts on CRACK! Surely we'd be able to find something there right? I decided to buy a cute mini-desk tree for my office, a gift for Shawns dad, and a star to TRY on the top of the tree. We couldn't find any stars that a) matched the decor and b) didn't dwarf our 4.5ft tree.

Here are the (humble) results of our tree. The bulbs we bought didn't come with any hooks and unfortunately we didn't think about that. So right now it just has the star ornament that DIDN'T work on top and an ornament from my childhood. It's definitely a work in progress. Merry Christmas Everyone!!

Thanksgiving Dinner!

My day started at 6:00am by waking up to put the turkey in the crockpot. Luckily it only took about 15 minutes and then I lazily fell back to sleep until 10:00am. Don't hate me because I got beauty rest :)

I spent a little less than two hours being in the kitchen preparing, which is a record! One of my biggest struggles with cooking in general is the magic of having all my dishes ready at close to the same time. Turkey-no prob, just chillin' in the crock pot. Stuffing and Potato Casserole-15 min @ 400 vs 20 min @ 375. I opted to leave them both in there for about 30 minutes on 375. The stuffing tasted pretty good (could have used a bit more salt and pepper), but I wish I'd baked it in a more compact dish. The potatoes were a) crunchy and b) not too flavorful. That may have been mostly because I forgot to buy an onion and just ended up using onion powder. It also could have used more salt/pepper or something. I don't know. I'm willing to give it a whirl as a side dish again and see about tweaking it. The pie turned out pretty well, even though my pie crust was all crumbled and shattered (I dropped it on the ground-sad panda). It was just REALLY rich!

I prepared some fresh green beans and asparagus as my veggies, and stayed within my portion control. It was so rewarding to NOT feel like I was going to explode with a super full stomach. I ate a small breakfast (eggo's with strawberries), and then ate a small dinner (frozen meal and some more veggies) around 7pm tonight. Here's a few pictures of the spread!

Aluminum Foil is a novice chef's best pal

The Spread-I brought out the fancy dishes to use on the
fancy table that rarely gets used.

My plate: Green Beans, Asparagus, Turkey, Potatoes, and Stuffing

Pie of sorts-it looks all weird but it tasted really good!

I'm an advocate for cooking/serving/storing any big meal in aluminum dishes.

Sessions with my Dream Dictionary

I had a weird night of dreams last night. In the spirit of the holiday sentiment I decided to decipher what it all means using the dream dictionary Marianne gave me. We used to consult the dream dictionary at work together to understand the underlying meaning of our odd dreams. Oh and I'm also going to use italics because it makes it seem more dream-like:

Late at night on a Saturday I drove to a deserted gas station, broke in and started vandalizing the place. A cop caught me in the act and I had to drive away quickly. Night turned into day and I remember being out in the country. I drove out to another old building and was hiding inside destroying things when I heard the cop outside. We started shooting our guns at each other, and I set an explosion inside the building and ran out. The cop caught me and handcuffed me. I couldn't figure out why I'd done all these bad things and I was really emotional about it. I asked the cop what I was supposed to do and he said I could go home until Monday since I didn't kill anyone, but that I might want to get in touch with a lawyer. I'd be picked up and brought to jail on Monday.

-to dream you're a criminal indicates that you're looking for a shortcut in life.
-to dream you're a convict suggests some situation or relationship is making you feel restricted
-to dream you're breaking something indicates change is ahead for you. You want to change the direction your life is going
-to dream that you feel guilty about something indicates that you feel you have let others down.
-to dream that a house or building is on fire indicates that you need to undergo some transformation
-to see explosions in your dream symbolizes your repressed anger. The reage that you've been holding in has come to the surface in a forceful and violent manner. Your unconscious is trying to get your attention.
-to dream that you shoot someone with a gun denotes your aggressive feelings and hidden anger toward a particular person.
-to dream that you see a lawyer suggests that help is available to you if you ask. Being involved in a lawsuit says you have insecurities and concerns of being judged or criticized for your actions.
-to dream that you're in jail suggests that you're feeling restrained or censored at work, or in a relationship or situation in life. You feel confined and suffocated.

**I woke up at this point because my alarm clock went off (6:00 am) to go put the Turkey in. I was only awake and up for 15 minutes and oddly I fell back asleep into this dream. The rest of it kinda kept skipping around but here are the highlights**

I was being transported on a train with two old friends on my way to jail. Annie Perry and someone else. I knew I kept in good contact with the unknown friend, but I felt guilty that Annie and I didn't email or chat. As we were getting ready to disembark from the train I found a piece of paper so I could write down my email address and my blog address but I kept messing up. I was finally forced to leave the train without giving it to her. I was somehow back at the first building I'd vandalized and I was walking my dog Bailey around the perimeter of the building in really tall grass. He did his business and we rounded the corner to check the mail. The mailbox was full of advertisements and wood chips and I wasn't able to push the woodchips aside well enough to grab the mail. The dog walk/mail checking sequence happened three or four times before I finally woke up.

-to dream that you're on a train symbolizes your life's journey. It suggests you're on the right track in life. Alternatively you have a tendency to worry needlessly over situations that will work out in the end.
-to see a childhood friend signifies regression into your past where you had no responsibilities and felt carefree.
-to dream that you're writing signifies communication with someone or with your conscious mind. It also denotes a mistake you have made.
-to see a dog in your dream indicates a skill you've ignored or forgotten but needs to be activated. Also symbolizes intuition, loyalty, generosity, protection, and fidelity.
-to see green grass in your dream suggests that there's a part of yourself that you can always rely on.
-mail: receiving mail indicates you need to communicate or re-establish contact with someone from your present/past. To see a mail box represents important information you're about to receive.
-to see wood in your dream signifies unsatisfactory business and misunderstandings in love.

So what does all this mean?? Dream analysis is pretty clouded and probably full of complete silliness, but poignant/odd dreams like this always make me sit back and think. I do feel a lot of those emotions (overwhelmed, disappointed, repressed anger, desire to be a better person). It's time to start prepping some dinner stuff, but I'm glad I got all that out :o)

Thanksgiving Day Foods

Here is what's on the menu for Thanksgiving Dinner. It's just Shawn and myself for dinner, so hopefully everything goes smoothly. Click on the links to see ingredients/supplies/how to

Turkey (credit to A Year of Slow Cooking)

**I played around with various ways of cooking turkey, and they mostly come up at 2 points per serving. This version sounds yummy and easy!**

Au Gratin Potatoes (credit to WW online recipes)

***I'll be making regular mashed potatoes as well for Shawn to enjoy-since I'll be peeling and cutting them anyway, but I'll be staying AWAY from them***

Stuffing with Sage and Chives (credit to WW online recipes)

**Stuffing has always been my one true weekness. YUM!**

Gravy of Doom

**For Gravy there isn't much option. I don't know how to make the legit bad-for-you gravy that I love so much, so we're opting for the Heinz Turkey Gravy. It's a healthy alternative and easy to prepare! (don't worry I won't eat the whole jar myself)

Turtle Pumpkin Pie (credit to KraftFoods.com)

**I'm using Keebler reduced fat pie crusts, Free Whipped Cream, Skim Milk, Sugar free caramel sauce, and the SF/FF vanilla pudding mix to make what I'm thinking looks and sounds like a tasty treat!**

WW Weigh In 11/23

Today I was down 1.6lbs for a total of 16.4 lost with WW! Here are a few goals for the week:

1) Journal every day-I'm pretty good during the day but all hell breaks loose once I get home from work for the evening.
2) No more snooze-I need to get my butt out of bed on time so I have a chance to eat breakfast before work and pack my lunch/healthy snacks.
3) Thanksgiving Day-I'm all stocked up on tasty veggies. Like our leader Jaime suggested, I'm going to fill half my plate with tasty steamed veggies and thoroughly enjoy (within moderation) my favorite Thanksgiving Dinner dishes.

I'll be posting my recipe ideas here in a bit, and I'm excited to give my report of how everything goes!

Choo Choo Choooo

This weekend Shawn and I touristed it up and decided to climb aboard the Bertram Flyer. It's a 3 hour train ride from Cedar Park to Bertram Texas on a super old train or something. It was my first train ride ever, but Shawn had been on a similar ride back home in Kentucky. We sat in first class station car (ooooo ahhhhh) which meant we were right behind the engine and we got free soda, a plate of treats, and a bag of chips.

(Enjoy these stock photos from the website. I totally didn't
jump out of the train to take them)

The ride each way was a little over an hour and it was kinda sorta boring. We were only going around 30 mph, and it was basically just a train ride through the back of people's yards with very little scenery. We saw a lot of fixer-uppers, a few Longhorn (hook 'em) and some horses and dogs. The train stopped in Bertram and we were able to get off for 15 minutes and walk around. Before leaving again, the engineers moved the engine to the back (now front) of the train for the ride home. That was kinda cool cuz then we could see straight out the back at the path behind us. Here are a few pictures of us being silly and passing the time:

Yep-this is what I get when I say "smile!" If you're wondering, he threw
the body off the back of the train to hide the evidence.

Here's Shawn proving he can do a happy face

Clearly my angry face is complete failure :)

And a few happy pictures of us in a station room and on the ride home in the caboose. It's fun getting out and seeing new things, and just spending time together in general. Luckily the weather is still nice and warm too! Tune in next time for the latest and greatest!

Yay!

This week at Weight Watchers I had good news-I finally lost the last little bit of weight I'd put on in the last few months during my surgery recovery/slack off time. That puts me down 14.8lbs since joining in July. It's not nearly what I'd like for myself but it is honestly what I earned. You remember that old saying "You are what you eat?" :p

I'm finishing this post a few days after I started it (It's Saturday now), but I'm happy to say I have my Thanksgiving shopping all done. I have my healthy menu mostly planned out, and a house full of good-for-me-food. I've been pretty irresponsible with eating this week, and haven't journaled like I should. My "mental notes" aren't nearly as accurate as pen and paper, but I am always striving to improve :)

That's all (for now) folks!

Weekend of Win

So yesterday Shawn and I ventured out to the Austin Celtic Festival. It had been a toss up between a quick trip down to San Antonio/Sea World or the Festival. We opted for the festival since it's only here once a year. If we'd gone to Sea World, we may have spent the whole time feeling emo and wondering how the Festival was, since we couldn't find out for another year...so we chose to go to the Festival.

We had the misfortune of getting stuck in UT Football traffic on the way down, but still got down there around noon. We brought the camera, but sadly there wasn't really anything worth photographing. Lots of cute dogs...but not so much in the way of authentic Celtic activities. I did learn that the Celtic's are way into Tye Dye shirts. Ok maybe not, but there was a huge shop display :)

We're glad either way that we ventured out and tried something new in the city we both know hardly anything about. I work next Saturday, but the weekend after that I think we're going to try a ride on the Bertram Flyer . Yes we are doing touristy things, but technically we both haven't done or seen very much here. Any native/long term Austinites have any good suggestions of fun things to do??

TGIF!

Today has been a long day. Something about getting in a car accident, staying out until 2am, and being to work by 8am. :o) I had a few weird back spasm/pain things during the night sleeping, and was generally sore and very exhausted all day. I talked to Janna around lunch time and she gave me a contact person for her insurance company so I could find out about medical claim/coverage. She and I both opted to go to a doctor to be checked out as a precaution.

They took some x rays that the doctor should have back by Monday. I got a prescription for a muscle relaxant and if needed, I still have some pain pills left over from my surgery. I doubt I will, but it's nice to know they're on hand!

Tomorrow Shawn and I are going to the Annual Austin Celtic Festival ! It's an all-weekend event, but we'll go check it out for a few hours tomorrow and see if there's anything cool. If anything I'm sure there'll be some cool people watching experiences. G'night all!

Good Times!

So last night I went with Janna and some of her friends to the Parish for the Marc Broussard concert downtown at the Parish. We all went out for dinner before at Outback Steakhouse and I have to say I had the BEST steak ever. I must have been craving red meat because that did the trick!

We split up in separate cars for the drive down. Janna and I in her jeep, and everyone else in her friend Suzi's car. We're a few blocks away from the concert and are stopped at the light when suddenly Janna tells me "Hold On!" I didn't understand what was going on until I heard the crash and felt the impact. Some guy driving behind us just totally crashed into the back of us! The impact crashed us into Suzi's car in front of us too! :(

Here are some pictures (that I casually borrowed for Janna's blog) of the driver's car-white and Janna's Jeep. The driver's airbags deployed, but the damage on Janna's car was isolated to the bumpers. Luckily we were the bigger car there.

We all had a great time at the concert once we finally got there, but partway into the concert we were all feeling the effects of the crash. I sat out for the last few songs, and most everyone else took a break too. We waited around to be able to get pictures/autographs with Marc but apparently he set up a meet and greet that none of us had known about. What a bummer! Marc missed the super fans that came to see him DESPITE being in a pretty significant car crash!

I got home around 1:30 am, and have decided that a) going out with friends and actually being social is FUN! but b) I'm really, really, really old. Wish we'd gotten some group pictures, but hopefully next time!

something is on my mind

So....my ex-husband got remarried last weekend to the woman he left me for. I wasn't surprised, but at the same time I was. The man that I'd been with for nearly 7 years is officially starting his new life with woman 2.0. For a very long time after he left, I waited to hear through the grapevine that she had dumped him and that he was miserable. I needed that to happen so I could feel justified that he'd made a mistake by leaving me. That I wasn't the crappy wife he'd told me I was, and that God punishes people who are unfaithful.

That clearly didn't happen. Instead he proposed to her and now he married her. Maybe they'll be happily married for 57 years, or maybe they'll end up painfully divorced. Just so we're clear, I hope for the latter.

I'm not in charge of their future and I'm really tired of wondering about their life together. I keep waiting for the day that I'll stop wishing bad things on them and move on with my own happy life. The more time that passes since we separated, the more worried I become that I still have all these unhealthy feelings.

That's all I have to say. Thinking out loud about this makes my brain hurt.

Mexico or Bust!

This is three-day old news, but my brother Thomas got his mission call this week. He'll be serving a 2 year mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (LDS/Mormon Church) in Mexico City, Mexico. He'll report to the MTC in Provo, UT to learn Spanish on Feb 3rd.

I'm not able to visit Utah to see him right before he leaves because it's during the black-out time off/merger at work. I've booked a flight a few weeks earlier to see him over President's Day Weekend. I'm in complete denial that my brothers are growing up so fast. More than half of the kids in the family are out on their own in the world now!!

I'm also excited that Shawn and I will be able to be together this year for Christmas. Last year (our first Christmas together), he flew home to visit his family in Kentucky for the Holidays. This year he's short on vacation time and said he wasn't in the mood to travel during the holidays, so I'll get to have him around this year! We're going to plan a road trip to go Kentucky in the spring time to visit his family and pick up a bunch of random stuff that's stored at his parents house there. I haven't done a long road trip in an really long time, so I'm looking forward to it-and to see different scenery besides Texas and Utah :)

I work therefore I am

Ok not really :)

It's my second day back at work and I'm surviving! I needed some pain pills and a heating pad once I got home last night thats for sure. I'm sure I'll be a bit tired for a while still, but that's to be expected. Work was really good about me being out, and is being really helpful and accomodating since I've gotten back too.

I didn't make my numbers for September due to my absense (and customer's dragging their feet). I missed the first half of October so it's not looking too great either, but I do have two loans that close this week. If I can manage to get another 60ish points in the next 2 1/2 weeks I'll have a fighting chance.

Bailey is going through separation anxiety again now that I'm not at home. I had the week of vacation at the beginning of september, then nearly 3 weeks at home. Poor little guy thought this was going to be the new norm. His potty behaviors are sucking right now--he knows the morning ritual (showering, breakfast) means he's going to go into his dark hole of emo. So now he just refuses to go outside unless I go with him. And at that he will only sit on the patio. *sigh*. Feels like it'll be starting from scratch. He's kennelled again to prevent emo destruction and accidents. Hopefully the little guy gets used to it again.

Ok that's all! Hasta Luego!

not quite ready..

I had my post op appointment yesterday morning. The doctor said things are coming along with my incision, but based on how I'm feeling (still needing to take vicodin on a regular basis, can't stay in the same position for more than a few minutes, and having sharp shooting pain by the late afternoon) that she wanted to keep me out of work for a little while longer. She extended my leave until next Monday which is a bank holiday, so I'll be back on Tuesday.

I was able to kind of find out the next steps, and more about what to expect going forward. I really hope this helps with the monthly pain and discomfort and I can have more "good days" in a month.

When did it become October already!

Wow, October hit when I was down and out I guess.

I think I'm improving, but it's hard to be sure really. I'm spending a LOT more time sitting/lying down. The less I move, the less I battle with that bothersome pain. However much I rest during the day though, by the time late afternoon/evening hits, I'm in quite a bit of pain. So I usually Vicodin up before I shower and head to bed. But I'm sleeping in bed now and having memorable dreams again so I think those are a step in the right direction.

I'm really anxious to go to my post op and find out what they think/say about everything, and whether I'm ready to be back to work or not. I tend to be a worry wart so I stress out about seeing small bits of blood on my clothes from the incision, and wonder if my stomach looks bloated or if I just got fatter. ....*sigh*....

Blaaaah

Last night I started having a burning/stabbing pain in my lower abdomen. The incision seems fine, but it's something internal. Most likely it's from a) overdoing it and b) sneezing and coughing. I took some leftover pain pills that Shawn had lying around from when his back went out so I could get some sleep. I called my doctors office this morning to see what they thought.

The nurse assistant Kelli called me back. After telling her about symptoms and feelings, she thinks it's probably not a huge concern. With abdominal surgery, there's can be a lot of settling and changes. They called in another Vicodin Prescription for me, and told me to take it easy and update them tomorrow.

I've got a stack of books, and my laptop/netflix queue ready to go! Wish me luck :)

Update

I'm starting feel more human-ish so I thought I'd update my blog about how surgery (and recovery) have been going. Forgive me if I fall asleep mid-update :p

I checked into the hospital last Wednesday morning. They got me into a room and changed pretty quickly and then we waited for all the pre-stuff. I was "lucky" enough to get a newbie assigned to me. She was really really nervous and kept dropping stuff and forgetting paperwork. At one point she dropped all the stuff from the IV packet and then went to start putting it in my arm. We all went "ummm--maybe you should get a new one huh?". She kinda did this pokey thing in my left arm and went fishing for my brain I think. She said it was for a vein, but I don't know about all that. She tried for entirely too long, made me bleed and hurt and then finally gave in and called in someone else. Before too long they wheeled me in. Last time I had surgery, I remember they kinda prepared me for being knocked out, but here they just BOOM shut me out.

When I woke up I was in cuhh-raaaazy amounts of pain. I wasn't breathing through my nose tube properly (cuz um OW, where are mah pills!), and really just had to calm down. Shawn and his dad told me bits about how surgery went. Everything went smoothly, they removed the fibroid, and didn't see any other complications while they were in there. I was schedule for an overnight stay, so they wheeled in another hospital bed so Shawn could sleep in there. His dad slept in the recliner. A nurse came in and checked on me every few hours to take stats and give pain killers. They took my catheder out sometime during the night and made me get up and walk around.

In the morning I was able to "do my business" satisfactorily so I was clear for discharge. Since I've been home I've been feeling a little less pain every day. I slept through the first day on the couch recliner, but started becoming more and more mobile. I'm done with the big happy pain pills now, and felt pretty good for a few days. I had a cold or allergies hit on Sunday and ever since then I've started to feel worse instead of better :(

I've had some awesome friends come by to check on me. My friend Leigh and her two kiddos came by on Saturday to drop off some snacks and gossip mags, and my friend Janna came over on Monday and brought a bag o goodies (magazines, movies and books) plus dinner and we got to chat for a few hours. Hopefully I'll keep myself sane enough and withstand the draw to overwork myself for something to do.

Thanks for all your loving, thoughtful comments!

p.s. Paul-no people pictures on this post on account of me looking like leftover washed out trash. The flowers though were a get well gift from my boyfriend's Dad :)

Today is the Day!

I'm part excited, part nervous, part relieved, and part nauseous that my surgery day is finally here. I'm really glad I have an awesome doctor/surgeon, and that her staff has really helped baby step me through all of this. I ask a LOT of questions, lol.

Funny thing about last time I had surgery-my thoughts going into surgery were "Shoot, I forgot my leftovers and water bottle at work" and "I sure hope I don't fart while I'm asleep, my anesthesiologist is pretty hot." That stuff carries over through all the loopy drugs apparently, because when I woke up I would not STOP insisting we go pick up my leftovers and water bottle (like 37 times), and kept asking if I'd farted/pooped during surgery. My DH kept trying to shush me up (esp about the bodily functions to prevent my embarassment), lol. Who knows what will come out of my mouth this time around!

My wonderful, sweet boyfriend Shawn will be there with me as well as his Dad who is in town from Kentucky. Bailey will be thinking about me all emo and depressedly at home. Plenty of prayers and good thoughts for me. To quote Allstate--"You're in Good Hands."

Adios!

Rain Rain Go Away

We finally got the truck today! A bit of running around to credit unions, banks, and the dealership but we got it all squared away this afternoon. We decided to go out for a celebratory dinner, and bag our trip to San Antonio on account of the fact that it'll be raining all weekend long.

After dinner we're JUST about home...literally coming down the hill to the last stop light, and we hear/see the car driving to our right driving too fast. Around the corner it tried to slow down and we could hear it start squeeling, slamming on his breaks unable to stop. He hit us in the back right side, and we fishtailed, swerving up and over medians and sidewalks trying to get control of the vehicle again. Luckily neither of us were seriously injured. My elbow is bruised and hurts from it banging into the door a few times, but we were really blessed that it was just us and the other car involved, and that no one was seriously injured.

So that's the way the monumental car buying/week chose to end. I feel so bad for him--his new toy he's been waiting forever to drive home took a nasty beating. And Karma--did you have to?

*sigh*

A week of lazin' about

I like to plan my vacation time from work around 3 day weekends. Call me cheap, but i like getting an extra day away thrown in there for celebratory purposes.

I've been on vacation this whooooole week. Have I done anything awesome and fun? Nope not really. For the first time ever, I can honestly say I've been bored and I'm ready to be productive again. I finished reading some books, watched some movies, and slept more than any 27 year old physically needs to.

There is still the small possibly that Shawn and I might go on a day road trip down to San Antonio, but it all depends on when this lazy credit union rep calls us back. The road trip is meant to be a "OMG lets go on a road trip in Shawn's fancy new-to-him truck!", but so far it's been more like the waiting game. So we'll see. I'm crossing my fingers because I'm stir crazy right now!! It'd be fun to go do something fun outside the house before I am outside the house--working :(

On another note, I got my surgery scheduled for September 23rd (yikes fast!). The closer it got to the holidays, the more scheduling conflicts I had with work, and the more unavailable my doctor became. So I just went ahead and fit it in where I could. So I'll be back to work for a week and a few days, then out for another few weeks. September is turning out to be the month of nothing getting done!

Quick Update

I was able to get into the Fertility Clinic on a chance cancellation on Friday. It was scheduled as a consultation, and we talked about my history and what our next steps would be. After looking over the medical records that had been sent over, she wanted to do her own ultrasound to determine what type of surgery I would need.

The fibroid is embedded in the uterine wall significantly enough that it will take more invasive surgery to remove. She said that most gynecologists could safely do this surgery, but in hopes of preserving my fertility, it would best to do a laparotomy (open the abdominal cavity) instead of of the laparoscopic procedure. I will have to stay overnight at the hospital, and be off work for a few weeks in recovery. I'm nervous, but I feel really confident in my doctor and I'm glad she'll be doing the procedure.

I struggle with the emotions of wondering if I'll ever be able to bear children. Seeing the future would sure come in handy sometimes, lol.

The stuff that's on my mind

I have "Womanly Issues". Always have, and lately it seems like I always will.

Long and short of it is: I've had problems with my monthly friend since I was probably a teenager. Those issues were kept at bay until my (ex) husband and I decided to try starting our family. When I wasn't conceiving, we found out it was at least partially due to endometriosis. So taddaa--surgery! It was a simple out-patient procedure that caused me to only miss a few days of work. The problem with these "issues" is they tend to come back. And in my case they come back with a vengeance.

I started seeing a new gyno back in June because it felt like my issues were just getting worse and worse, and every month I was in more pain than the month before. Thanks to her, I started getting some answers and headway. A ultrasound showed that I have a 3 cm Cystic Fibroid (non cancerous tumor) inside my Uterus. That's causing some of the problems, but my doctor wanted to run more tests to make sure they were fully diagnosing the problems. So I had an HSG (fancy pants kind of ultrasound) done, which determined that my left Fallopian Tube was completely blocked, and my right Fallopian Tube was partially blocked, and had some bubbles or kinks. That is usually caused by endometriosis, or scar tissue from old endometriosis.

My next step is to go to the Austin Fertility Clinic. I've been trying to set an appointment on my own but I've been having a hard time at it because I'm not trying to actively get pregnant. Apparently that's like their thing...being a fertility clinic and all.... Weird huh? But anyhow, hopefully that all comes together in the next few weeks and I can start meeting with them and finding out when they'll schedule surgery, and confirm that I don't have any pre-cancerous, cancerous, or otherwise abnormal cells related to my "issues".

This has been on mind a lot lately, because of what it could potentially mean. I'm really trying hard to not worry until I know if there's something to be worried about. I miss my family a lot right now, and just the support that comes from having loved ones close by. When I went through all this before, they were close and I was married. Life was a bit "different". It's hard for me to realize that my dreams of being a mother some day are looking rather dismal. I'm very aware that my biological clock isn't running very smoothly. It just kind of puts everything into perspective ya know?

On happier note--my weight loss/excercise activities are paying off. I've lost a total of 11 pounds with Weight Watchers so far. I need to step it up more for sure, and not let other life stuff get in the way. All in all, things really are wonderful and I feel blessed and loved :)

Dullard Nonsense

I love it what Simon says that to American Idol hopefuls. He'd most definitely say that about my blog too-unfortunately.

So--Every time I check other people's blogs, I'm reminded about the fact that I haven't updated anything of note in over a month. Probably actually longer since my last few posts have been about my trip to Utah which happened in May people.

So Here's a list of things I've been up to. In no apparent order, priority or reason. Enjoy!

1. I made my monthly bonus at work for 3 whole months in a row! Woohoo!
2. I finally took my car into the insurance adjusters-3 months AFTER the hail storm. The very same day I got my check for the damage, it hailed again. I don't think there's any spot on my car that ISN'T dinged now. Oh wells-it'll be replaced soon enough!
3. I turned 27. *Sigh*-that much closer to 40. I have to say that even though my life isn't what I ever imagined it to be by now, I'm fairly happy with it.
4. One-year anniversary of the date my divorce finalized. Weird, surreal, sad, upsetting, peaceful.
5. One-year anniversary of my first date with Shawn. Love that man so so much!
6. I bought a butt-load of Country Apple lotion from Bath and Body Works. It brings happiness to my senses and skin.
7. I finished my 3 month stint of working out with a trainer. I lost a total of 17 pounds, 8% body fat, and 15 inches overall. Not nearly as much as I should have, but I was lackadaisical with my eating habits.
8. I started Weight Watchers with my friend Janna! Well technically I'm in my first week, so this is new news. She's an awesome inspiration and has lost around 100lbs on the program! It's time to take charge!
9. I got a piano for my burp-day!!! OMG YAY! Well it's a digital piano and fits nicely into overhead compartments. But to me it doesn't matter. I love playing, and love having music more a part of my life now. I'm debating starting up piano lessons to try to re-learn and practice up the skill sets that I've lost.
10. I miss Diet Pepsi Vanilla. I can't find it anywhere anymore.
11. I registered to vote and became an organ donor.
12. I've done the laundry--a few times. Speaking of, need to do that again badly.
13. A customer called me "freakishly white". That's not very nice to say to a non-tan individual.
14. I miss good television. I've been watching entirely too much Deadliest Catch marathons, Star Trek re-runs and movies on cable. I'm excited to watch Glee and Community when they start in the fall.
15. I bought an ipod docking station and somewhat loaded the songs I wanted on it. It took me like 17 tries. I had it figured on try 16, but then I accidentally chose Zimbhaenbwebti as the default language. Whoops.

See!!! That was absolutely Dullard Nonsense! Tune in next time, where I'll be "A Complete Load of Rubbish"

As Promised--a few family pictures

Here's a few of the pictures (that i don't look like a crazy fat cow in) from our family photo shoot in May 2009. We went to Wheeler Park in the afternoon and had quite a few taken. Here's some of my faves

Dad riding a wooden horse. For anyone who knows my dad,

this one's not surprising :)
Blackham Family Kiddos
*Back L to R: Jonathan, Scott, Kyle, Thomas, Andrew
*Front L to R: Amy, Matthew
The Whole Fam Damily!
*Back L to R: Thomas, Matthew, Andrew, Amy, Scott, Jonathan, Kyle
*Front L to R: Dad, Mom

Bad sleep plus stress make Amy something something....

go crazy? don't mind if I do!! Lately I sleep for a few hours, then randomly wake up and stay away for a good 30 minutes before I can fall back asleep. I'm sure it's due to a lot of things but man it's exhausting. At least I managed to fit in a solid 2 hour nap this afternoon. :o)

Anyhow, I'm still alive just working really really hard lately. There is a lot of pressure and stress at work, and new responsibilities being added to the plate constantly. I made my quota for April and hopefully made it for May as well (but might have had a loan book a few days too late). Time will tell. It feels good getting a bonus and, if only for a short while, keeping my name off the naughty list.

Later Gator!

Pictures from Utah

My family always has the prettiest bulbs growing in the front yard.
If only I had that kind of green thumb. I swear I could kill a
weed if you asked me to keep it alive :p

The Hutching's dog Skye wearing a tiara. She is so well
behaved, even though you can tell she's super excited
to see new people. We had a fun time bonding together that night :)

Aimee & Amy. And yes, mine is the correct
way to spell the name :p Love ya Aimee!

Me and Jonathan (21 yrs old). Jonathan just got home from an LDS mission to Arizona. Ever since he got taller than me, I startedcalling him "shortie". He calls me "giant" and always remarks thatit looks like I've "gotten taller" since he saw me last. Love ya Jono!

Thomas (18 yrs old) and Me. He just got
accepted to go to BYU Provo for the fall.
I can't believe how much he's growing up. He's
a really talented artist and writer, I look up to him a lot.

Amy & Kyle (12 yrs old). Kyle is the "baby" of the family.
The only reason I'm slightly taller than him in this picture
is because I'm wearing shoes! Sigh...I'm the shrimpiest
of my family :(

Amy & Matthew (22 yrs old) Matthew and I have
grown much closer over the years. We may have
tormented each other as kids, but we have
so much in common. Love ya bitty!

Andrew & Scott (15 yrs old) with Amy. I purposely didn't take a picture standing up with them because they're nearly a foot taller than me! I swear they grew 5 inches since I saw them last year. Good lookin' boys I say. I had to have them help me remember which was which so I didn't label the picture wrong, lol. I swear I never messed it up when I lived at home. Sorry guys :(

Scott (15 yrs old) and Me. I have such a fun time
hearing about Scott's busy life and how he's doing in school :)

Andrew (15 yrs old) and Me. He's my "initials" friend
(our initials are both "ASB"). I can't believe
how fast he's growing up!

**pretty weak picture turnout, but I'm glad I have the memories I do. I'll update and post a few of the good family pictures once I get the proofs on CD**